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Samurai Appliance Repair Man's Blog



Entrance Exam for Appliance Technical Data Sheet Writers

Posted by Samurai Appliance Repair Man, in General Appliance Repair Wisdom, Humor 19 March 2013 · 506 views
tech sheet

I've had f2 errors where the problem was a thermal fuse. Usually I test probe and fuse (if there is one), and reset ecm if possible before I replace a board on any oven, regardless of manufacturer or error codes.

With regards to tech sheet writers, the following question and response was found on 85 % of their requirement exams...

Posted Image

The problem is, their examiners consider it the correct answer.



Source: GE Oven Mod#JTP95WCW1WW F2 error code



Appliantology 3000 Microchip Implant Now Available

microchip, appliantology, implant

As many of my long-time grasshoppers know, the CIA occasionally calls upon the Samurai for special assignments which are particularly dangerous.




I have recently completed yet another covert assignment for The Company; this one involved testing a prototype of an implantable microchip. My assignment was to be the human test subject and to have this protoype implanted into my spine.




The Agency has declassified portions of this project and I am now free to tell you about this brilliant technological breakthough. The microchip is called the Appliantology 3000® Total Appliance Awareness Microchip Implant (TAAMI). Its purpose is to provide appliance repair technicians with instant and total access to information on every appliance ever made or that will be made. TAAMI meets or exceeds all of its design objectives. Below is a photograph of the Appliantology 3000® Total Appliance Awareness Microchip Implant:




Appliantology 3000 Microchip-- click for larger view
Appliantology 3000® Microchip




I cannot emphasize strongly enough how much of a windfall TAAMI is for our national security. The successful implantation of TAAMI into every appliance repair technician in America will make our nation invulnerable to all threats, foreign and domestic.



I know many appliance technicians reading this have serious concerns about receiving such an implant. Some of you are concerned about civil liberties issues such as privacy; others may be apprehensive about having a device surgically implanted into your spine. Let me assure you that you have nothing to fear on both counts. Privacy in this electronic age is an illusion--Big Brother already knows everything about you.




As for the surgery, ain't nothing to it. A skilled surgeon implants the chip into the lumbar region of your spine, as shown below:




Location of TAAMI Implant-- click for larger view
Location of TAAMI Implant




The procedure only takes about an hour and half and you're out of the hospital that same day. You're left with a tiny, permanent lump at the base of your spine which is completely unnoticeable. You can barely see it in the picture below:




Side View of TAAMI Implant Site-- click for larger view
Side View of TAAMI Implant Site




But wait, there's more! The Appliantology 3000® Total Appliance Awareness Microchip Implant is also an integrated communications device. Throw away your cell phone, voice recorder, and all those other gadgets. Since the Appliantology 3000® microchip is uplinked to the global satellite phone system, you can make phone calls to anyone in the world from whereever you are by simply talking! Here's an example of a voice recording I made today on the implant by simply speaking normally:



The sound quality is a little muffled because the sound has to travel down my spinal canal to reach the microchip at the base of my spine. But still, you can hear the words clearly. Sound quality enhancement is one of the design goals slated for the second generation of TAAMIs.




If you are a currently practicing appliance repair technician, the Department of Homeland Security will be contacting you soon to schedule your implant surgery. In the meantime, I am available to answer any questions or discuss any concerns you may have regarding the Appliantology 3000® Total Appliance Awareness Microchip Implant. Feel free to post your questions or comments here. Remember: we appliance repair technicians are the vanguard defending Truth, Justice, and the Ameedikan Way!




What if Edgar Allen Poe was an Appliantologist?

Posted by Samurai Appliance Repair Man, in Humor, Goofs 08 November 2011 · 1,116 views

What do you get when you cross Edgar Allen Poe, Appliantology.org, and Chief Master Appliantologist DurhamAppliance? Answer: The Craven

THE CRAVEN
or If Edgar Allen Poe (Master Poe?) was an Appliantologist (and less talented)



Once upon a late night dreary, while I staggered, weak and beery
Over many a quaint bottles from the neighborhood store.
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping
As of someone barely rapping, rapping at my kitchen door
It's my girl, I stammered, "tapping at my kitchen door
Only this and nothing more"

Presently my soul grew stronger, hesitating then no longer
"Baby" said I, "truly your forgiveness I implore:
But the fact is I was dozing when you came a nozing
Around my kitchen door that I scarce was sure I heard you."
Then here I opened wide the door
...Darkness there, and nothing more.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing
until the silence was quickly broken, scared to death I began choking
As the tapping. no the rapping, no the knocking I was sure,
Was the knock knock knocking of my GE's compressor.
The tell tale sign of death of my GE's compressor.

Nightmares of spending money, as I imagine my sweet honey
Shop, shop, shopping from store to store. "We must have a french door
A Wolf, a Sub Zero" she'd implore "or better yet a Thermador."
While in the background the constant knocking of my GE's compressor,
the knock knock knocking of my GE's compressor.

The knocking became a squeaking, as if the fridge was speaking
But it could not be no more than the state of my stupor,
Morphing sound into speech from the cursed compressor,
From the knock knock knocking of the cursed compressor.
"it's only the beer, and nothing more."

Then came an ungodly sound, my soul entranced, my mind spellbound
against its will to perform an act, to sell my soul through Faustian pact.
"Open my door" it forcefully roared, "the door to me, the Motherboard!"
Am I in hell or is this still the knocking, the constant knocking of my GE compressor?
I had to find out, I had to explore or was I compelled to remove the door.
or simply too craven to ignore.

The door fell open awakening evil inside. "Save me" it ordered, SAVE ME!" it cried
"Buy another fridge get another GE, Remove that board. Replace it with me!"
Suddenly from a drawer I withdrew a stake for fondue, From Hell's heart I stab at thee! From Hell's heart I run you through!"
What came over me? Something in my core? Something reinforced by Appliantology.org?
I continued the destruction while shouting at the board, "buy another GE, Huh? Ha!..............Nevermore!"



Source: "The Craven" an appliance related Tale of Horror


Things my customers love to hear

Posted by Samurai Appliance Repair Man, in Goofs, Humor 15 April 2011 · 447 views

Anyone else have this problem during service calls?










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