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Things customers say while you're in their home on a service call...


Samurai Appliance Repair Man

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Every day, professional Appliantologists have the unique privilege of going into people's homes on appliance repair service calls. And it really is a privilege... most of the time.

We meet all kinds of people and every professional Appliantologist has fond memories of those "special" customers because of some of the things those customers say to brighten our day while we're in their homes and working on their appliance.

Here's a slice-of-life collection of some of these memorable pearls from our customers. These are all from real-life service calls and uttered by real-life customers. Could've been your neighbor, aunt, brother-in-law, or even YOU.

"Do you want me to hold that?"

"Do you need a flashlight?"

"Do you mind if I clean this?"

"How do you know that's the problem?"

"What if it doesn't work when you're done?"

"I think that goes there."

"I left it apart to make it easier for you."

"My brother in law said it's the glow plug."

"No, the refrigerator door has never been left open."

"My lawyer doesn't even charge that much."

"My dad used to do appliance repair for Sears and he says.....

"My husband took it apart to try and fix it but he's not very handy"

"My sons friend tried to fix it and I think he lost a piece"

This one is becoming more common: "The internet said....

Or,

"How long will it work after you repair it"?

Uh, forever. Or until something else breaks. By the way, here's the winning Powerball numbers for next Saturday. And don't take that flight next month. Trust me.

"Can you come over right now? You can? Great! I have to run to the store, can you wait 45 minutes for me?"

I offer a $25 discount if they pay the entire bill in cash.

"Oh! I don't have enough cash on me. Can you follow me to the bank and I'll get it for you?"

Have you ever worked on one of these before?

1) No, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night

2) No, but I watched someone work on one of these. It was kinda boring so I didn't watch the whole thing.

"Are you going to be able to get that back together?"

"Will it be cheaper if my husband helps you take the oven out of the wall?"

"How did that get in there?"

"I don't know what is wrong with it, the wife/mother/owner made the service call"

"What do you mean it's not covered by the warranty, the salesman said it would be?"

" My husband in an engineer"

"I'll be watching to make sure there are no screws left over"

"will this take long? I have another appointment in 10 minutes..."

"I left the door open, but my daughter is home, she's 16"

"some guy from another company ordered these parts, but never came back..."

You need some tools? Here I have mine.

What did you do to fix it?

Where did you learn this stuff?

& the winner is "I think it's the timer."

Can you fix my (appliance), I already bought the part.

I bought my (appliance) from Home Depot, don't they sell replacement parts ?

my old fridge was 20 years old and never had a thing go wrong with it

ok so where is that fridge ??

oh it died

you know i do charge extra to reassemble before i can diagnose whats wrng with it

so who removed the dishwasher from the cavity ?

my husband

thats great he gets to put it back in tonight after i have fixed it :)

do you know whats wrong with it yet ?

yeh its not cold

who installed the dishwasher ?

my husband he is an engineer

oh yes i can see that he is

yes no one left the door open on the fridge

ok here look at the ice here and look at this data see someone left the door open

oh that must have been my husband getting icecream

no we didnt put the wrong detergent in the dishwasher

pulling out a pile of rubbish from washing machine

you do realise that i cant put this through extended warranty

oh ok runs off and yells at kids

ok mate i'll tell you why your freezer isnt freezing food

thats because your freezer is actually a fridge :D

"My son is handy, do you need a helper?"

"Will you take your shoes off?"

"My freezer is warm, but the refrigerator side is working perfectly."

"Will that fix the refrigerator too?"

"They told me at the store that I could put chicken bones in the dishwasher."

"Do you fix ceiling fans?"

"Oh, I thought you were a plumber...so what are you?"

"I can get the part for $4 on Amazon."

"It looked so easy on YouTube."

"Company X doesn't have a service charge, why do you?"

"I work at a bank consulting for small business, your service is too high, it should be $35."

Two more, after quoting the price from book or experience.

"Gasp YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING, I ONLY PAID THIS MUCH FOR IT.

Why so much, I only paid this much for it.

Why so much, 1)you did not do anything. or 2)you did not spend much time on it,

It looked easy to repair, why so much.

Your crazy that's too much (after spending an hour tracing down a short in a hot garage with no ventilation)

Joe on Craigs list has a $20 service charge. (Why do you call me then) I'm not to sure about Joe. (( Really I had this conversation))

I love to hear this one, I won't bother you while you are working, then every couple of minutes "how is it going?" "Is it fixed yet?"

Source: Things customers say while you're working...

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Good job - now I think I will "defrost the fridge tonite" or as the wife calls it "foreplay".

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All great lines, and in the 6 months I've been working at this profession, I've already heard about half of those you guys have encountered (I'm in N.E. PA).  Maybe you guys can post some witty / subtle sarcastic / "please go away and let me do my job" responses so I don't have to think of my own. 

I was replacing a lid switch on a Kenmore washer, this jobless guy living with his son and daughter in law wanted to know how long I was going to be so he could go buy a carton of smokes and a powerball ticket.  Then he tells me, "I told them it's the lid switch.  I knew that.  Those lid switches are all over Ebay for 5 bucks".  Not wanting to come off sounding sarcastic, I said, "Really? That's a deal.  So why didn't you buy one and fix it for them?  You said you're not working."  Guess I wasn't too successful at not oozing sarcasm, but I did succeed at getting him to leave me alone. 

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The other day this guy insists on being called a Dr. every time I call him Mr. ...   He's a mathematics major / college professor I think he said.   When I was done, he tells me have the company bill him as he has no checks or cash (I think he could see I wasn't thrilled).  Minutes later he comes back and says, what's the total, I have one check left.  After handing me the check for $160. he then says, "I'm in the wrong business, you guys run a racket".  The check #103. 

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